Sunday, September 22, 2013

Whisper of My Heart

Wingless heart in the left strangely flutters,
Sighing the whisper hard to decipher,
Melodiously humming the unknown song,
Letting the heart dance  in the rhythmic harmony.

Jeopardizing the systematic beating,
And mystifying the bizarre  feelings.
Within, creating a little commotion
With the nameless emotions.

Encouraging the zeal  for new found feeling.
Fully aware of the message of little cupid,
Yet tug back with fears of unknown.
Vulnerably and stubbornly,  a heart shields itself again.

Monday, September 16, 2013

Battling the Night

On 16/9/2013

With the creepy feeling and suffocating with heat, I woke up and check the time and it was 2:09am. To get a better access of the slow-motion fan of maximum turned speed, I planned to sleep on the floor with the assistance of the thin bed sheet. I was about to sleep when roommate said “Tshering, toilet jo gay.” We went and came back.

I was about to sleep on the floor when she suggested that I can sleep on her bed and she will sleep on my bed with my friend (by the way I had a friend who came for a sleepover). Liking the idea of not having to sleep on the merciless hard floor, I lay on her bed.

I closed my eyes and felt little unusual sleeping on the other’s bed but without caring I tried to get sleep. Sleep seems miles away and my mind started wandering all around and finally got stagnated on the movie I watched on Saturday (The Conjuring (2013) -latest horror movie.) The movie wasn’t that scary but realistic and relatable with the daily happenings.

I crossed my fingers and scolded myself to think something pleasant. At some extent I succeeded but again the images from the movie started popping out. I tossed left and right with the hope that I will be able to fall sleep with the change of direction. I was about to drift into the little subconscious state when I heard a loud bang on the door. I got alert with the shudder.

Mastering the every ounce of my courage (I believe there wasn’t much left), I woke up to inspect what is happening. I switch on the light and found that we haven’t latched the door (we because I don’t remember who came last after going to the toilet). I latched it and made my bed on the floor and slept near them (even two meter distance seem very far).

I laid on the floor, saw cupboard at the diagonal edge of the room triggering the scene from the ‘The Conjuring’ where the ghost jump from the cupboard and attacked the victim. I held my breath, closed my eyes and tried to divert my thoughts. To despair, hallucinated the shadows moving and heard the clear crack of the door and heard clear footsteps in the corridor (I knew someone was going to the toilet at that moment but…..)

I moved to my bedside and without trying to wake my friend I held her hand, being a light sleeper, she woke and asked “Hang awa ya?” (“What happened?”).  “Menang ophu mala, young kheyna. Gadang gae” (I am scared and I can’t sleep, give me your hand.) I answered. She dozed off after giving hand. I held it tight as if promising to never let it go.

Holding a hand definitely helped me but sleep was far away. It was useless, so I stopped fighting and let my mind wander in the desired direction. I don’t know how long I stayed like that (seemed pretty long), my friend Sonam waked and asked “Oma bu ma yeb chin mo?” and I said no.

I thought of calling mother but I discarded the idea as I wasn’t a child anymore. My thought shifted to the similar incident when I was in class 10, I couldn’t sleep that night. I pinched my little sister who was sleeping with me to make her wake up, she flinched but it was futile relying on her. I called “Ama, Ama…oh Ama” who was sleeping in the adjacent room. “Hang ya?” she answered, “Menang ophu mala.” I said. “Baza guru drang ne yebcho.” I chanted holy mantra and tried to get sleep for a while but it was hopeless. After some time, I again called mother and this time she came to my room and slept next to me. She asked what happened and I said I am not able to sleep as someone had died in the locality. She asked me to think something pleasant and try to get some sleep. She hugged me, I believe it was magic of mother’s love as I slept shortly after that.

I missed mother and wished she was here with me at that moment, with a sigh I pretended that she was here hugging me tight and asking me to sleep. Assuring me that she is always there for me, I knew morning wasn’t that far but finally I dozed off. Shortly after, I felt it was that not more than 10 minutes or more, I again the heard constant knock on the door.  Reluctantly I woke up and opened the door and saw my friend next door asking us to wake up. They woke up but I slept on my bed and my roommate said “Tshering wake up, we have morning assembly today.” To my rescue, my friend Sonam said “Let her sleep, she slept in the early morning only.”  Thanking her mentally I slept again.

At 7:00 am sharp I woke up and sighed “Thank God” It’s over, the longest night with the shortest sleep and promised ‘No More Horror Movies’.

Friday, September 13, 2013

A Girl Who Ran Away From her Own Shadow

Not so long ago, there was this timid girl who always hated the light because the moment the lights empowers the world, her shadow followed her. She didn’t exactly hate the light but she blamed the light for the appearance of her shadow. As she would describe the ugly dark shadow of her, she hated the fact that shadow copied her every move, she detested the fact that it reflects everything she does, she despised shadow for a reason that it is an exact replica of her, she reviled the ugly truth that it will never leave her alone until she leaves the world. She refrained from doing anything with the fear that her shadow will copy.  She punished the shadow by standing still; she would stay in one corner hiding from her own shadow.

When the sun waves goodbye to the day and submerged behind the farthest mountain, a girl’s smile beamed on her face. Though her happiness was temporary, she would enjoy the moment in the absence of her shadow. She loved her privacy, she loved her OWN time and she wished that shadow will vanish forever from her life.

One beautiful day, she saw a kitten chasing  its  own shadow, running  and playing with it. Even with nobody around kitten looked very contended and happy with the simple assurance that its shadow is forever with it.

A girl looked at her own shadow and saw a dark and thin shadow standing still with shoulder hung as if it has been heavily loaded, as if it is carrying the whole world’s pain. “Oh my god!” with the utter shock she covered her mouth with her little hand and saw shadow doing the same. She became curious and moved right, the shadow moved right and when she stops it stops, then she raised her left hand up and waved and saw shadow doing the same. She jumped with the excitement and started dancing and saw her shadow doing exactly the same.

That day a girl realized that she wasn’t running away from her shadow but herself. Loved one might leave, friends might betray, others might hurt but shadow will do no harm and stay with you forever. Shadow plays when you play, laugh when you laugh, run when you run, fly when you fly, dance when you dance and cry when you cry but never leaves you even when it is dark, its just that you don’t see it. It stays with you forever. From that day onwards shadow became her best friend and she stopped running away from the shadow and herself.
And she lived happily ever after.


Photo Courtesy: Bing Images

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

You have got a Beautiful SMILE and you know it right?

You have got a beautiful smile and you know it right?
Yeah I am talking to you who is reading it right now. You must be wondering how the hell I knew or know that you have got a rather beautiful smile or ugly doma stained teeth, but trust me the moment you smile you become beautiful and that’s why I am saying you have got a very beautiful smile. If you don’t believe me, just smile and look at the mirror and you will see the truth yourself. Trust me a smile is infectious. The moment you see someone smile genuinely, an automatic smile appears on your face. Sometimes a genuine smile from even a stranger makes our day beautiful.

What is the harm in smiling? Do we really need a valid and good reason to smile? We rather feel like s/he is a stranger so why do we need to smile at strangers. We have a notion that a  smile can give a wrong hint to others, do you really think it does? But I don’t find any harm in smiling.  I would rather say smile whenever you can. Smile when you are happy; smile even when you are in pain to show that you have the strength to overcome that pain. Dark moods engulf the smile and spoil the atmosphere. So never let your smile get buried. Add a glow to your face by smiling because smile is a natural and cheap makeup one can wear.

Sherub Tenzin says “You don't need shining teeth and beautiful face to smile. Smiling cost nothing but gains many things especially friends. Keep smiling....: D”and I totally agree with him. So a  smile is a gateway to one’s heart.  Don’t forget to smile because you have got a beautiful smile and that’s the gift from god, value it and be happy. 

Feel the difference  and smile :)
"You've got that smile that only God can make." by sister Tshering Dema of BBS

Moment to Cherish Forever

“Good things come when you least expect it.” By anonymous.

A little unexpected and sudden trip to Sikkim but the best moment of my life. I wanted to freeze that moment forever, so I am immortalizing it by penning down the amazing feelings I had. The beautiful scenery of clean and green Sikkim was breathtakingly awesome. The serenity and homeliness of Deorali Goenpa were just another soothing factor that contributed to my happiness. Most of the monks  we met were Bhutanese, it was just like another home in India. 

For a moment I forgot that I have to study a complicated modules back at college and I had skipped classes to make a trip possible.  Short and sweet trip but it manages to steal little part of my heart. I wished that I could stay there forever but huh dreams are dreams only, had to wake up and come back.  It was my first trip but I sincerely pray that it will not be the last. I wish to return one fine day.


Lighting  butterlamps :)

Beautiful Flowers

Friday, September 6, 2013

Questionnaire on Blogging

Relationship with writing has been as long as I knew how to hold a pen. I used to scribble everything usually my feelings on a piece of paper or in the middle pages of my notebooks. Previously I used to write on a notebook to keep track of the things and feelings, then I maintained Diary. I remember late at night when some students were busy studying and some sleeping, I used to write whatever that comes into my mind on the book with the assistance of torch light. Its how writing got injected in me. And now I blog J

1.Why did you start blogging in the first place? And what’s the story behind your blog title?
Ans: In 2011, after reaching here at college I don’t remember exactly but I guess I saw friend sharing sir Passu’s Diary and later saw Langa Tenzin’s blog on facebook. That’s how I got introduced to blogging. They are the source of my inspiration and they always have great posts.   Then I made one without any post for many months following and reading all the possible updates of the passionate and ardent bloggers.

At the beginning of the year, when a second parliamentary round of election was in due course, I was thoroughly  frustrated not having received my postal ballot on time. That’s when I wrote a sarcastic letter to Postal Ballot and after that I  seriously started blogging  
Owing to my weirdness, initially I kept the title of my blog as My Weird World but later change to My Bizzare World.

2.How long have you been blogging? Where are you based?
Ans: My first post on the blog was on last October but seriously I started blogging since May this year only. I am based on CST, Phuentsholing.

3.How do you schedule your blog post? Daily or weekly? Or as and when inspiration strikes you?
Ans: I write whenever I feel like writing. I must say I usually write when inspiration strikes me and there are more than 3 posts on my blog by the end of the month.

4.Does your family and friends know about your blog?

And: My parents do not know about my blog but I guess my brother knows about it. Yeah my friends knows about my blog, and I acknowledge my friend Tshering Delkar who always encourages me to write more. Thank you dear J

Blessed with Friend

Talking with you have made me realized how much I missed you.

We neither need friendship testometer to measure it nor we need to die for each other to prove it. God will be ashamed to deny it and world envy it for what we have: we have a pure and true form of friendship. Blessed are those who have a true friend and I am doubly blessed because I have you.

As someone said to me earlier “Distances are just a test to see how far love can travel.” And our friendship travels faster than the light and illuminates more light than the sun.  A simple assurance of standing by side and never letting go of each other at any cost is a gift I got from you.  We understand each other without having to utter a single word; even listening to each other’s silence is a great pleasure. I feel it and you say it, I still wonder how you can read me so well. It's like you know me more than I do.

Its trust based foundation with little expectations from each other with the abundance showering of love, care and affection for each other. I respect you and our friendship. You are best ever thing happened to me. Today is neither your birthday nor friendship day but I feel the need to let you know that you are being cherished and remembered by your friend. Miss you so much.

I couldn't ask more from GOD coz he gave me u and u r more than I deserve. Luv u Phuntsho :)

I Owe an Explanation to Myself

My last update on the blog was on the 18th of August and phew it’s pretty long gap. I was on study and medical leave ( I owe an explanation to myself). I  couldn’t update due to some unavoidable reasons such as due to phase test 1 which was scheduled at the end of the previous month, to be precise 29th, 30th and 31st of August. It’s like whole CSTians have been fed tests as a meal. 90% of students did 3 three tests per day excluding the backing papers. Some friends who have back papers did five tests on a single day. Thank god! I didn’t keep one but if we go at this rate I am sure I will not be lucky next time. Gosh! If we human being are forced, I am convinced we can perform any type of task.

Previously when the system of tests was based on randomness with accordance to the tutor’s and students convenient, students used to complain when two or more tests coincide in a week and we used to request Lecturer to postpone but this time with the introduction of the phase test system, doing tests was just like having dessert after meals.

Surely the management here knows how to give a pinch of doing real tests to the students. Students hardly got time to stand and stare, it has been just like chasing a pavement of studying when time was giving a hard competition by running out so fast.

Another lame excuse for not updating blog, health issue. Lately I have been flat with whatever the reasons, eat something different vomit all and flat next day. Getting drenched in the rain, eat ice cream, work hard and will bleed hell from the nose and next day flat on the bed. Hardly had an energy to stand, this is so unlike me I mean getting sick over every little stupid reason. My immune system can’t be this worse.
Life can’t be joking with me, getting sick during exam time is so unfair. 
But life is not always considerate as we expect so never expect much from it rather prepare well to face every unexpected card of the life.

Every moment of the life is unique and have lesson attached to it, so enjoy fully. Even the pain has a different charm, so relish it.