Wednesday, December 24, 2014


Sob sob…I heard an intangible sob on the other end of the phone.
“What happen, Sonam?” a protective and concerned sister in me spoke.
“I got a semester back.” I gathered the paused words she managed to speak in between in sobs. Failing is definitely not great news. Hiding a little disappointment in me and after a moment of preparation of speech in mind, I repeated “It may not be true. Did you confirm it? It’s ok. Where are you? Office…Just don’t cry in the office.” I couldn’t imagine colleagues staring at a crying intern in the office.

She asked me to check online on her college website. A worst fear was confirmed when her roll no. was punched in the command box. She failed in three modules out of six with a verdict of fail written in capital letter. I punched another roll no. randomly and when screen displayed result.

“Your friend Miss X failed in all modules and I am glad that you managed to pass in three papers.” I could hear a little laugh mixed with sob.
“Apa will scold me.” I heard a terror in her voice.
“Don’t worry. I will tell him and I am sure he will understand. “ I told her unsure of myself.
Every child is scared of revealing a result to parents especially a failure, we were not exception. The fact that we siblings have not failed before aggravate the situation. Though they may not have mentioned, I know that parents have great expectation from us
“Do you want to tell me now?” I asked.
“No!” she screamed.
“Ok. I will tell him after I get my results. I am also scared but I think I will manage to pass with one or two reassessments.”
“Ok.” I heard a sob again.
“It’s ok dear. It’s not a big deal. One of my friends failed twice.” I made a blunt attempt to make her feel good by telling that she is not a first to get a semester back.

Four days passed since her results were out and I still haven’t talked with parents. My results weren’t out. I was restlessly apprehensive and a dream of flying downwards was escalating a worst fear in me.

I was in a shower when Sonam Choden banged a door, “Tshering result out dewa, we are the only two with reassessment (RA) in DCS- II.”
“What DCS-II, only two of us?” I shouted back.
“Yes, only two of us. I don’t feel like studying in vacation.” She said.

My heart sank with disappointment as I didn’t expect to get RA in DCS-II. I didn’t perform that well in ECT, so I asked “Me neither. I didn’t bring any books. Better report early to the college and study. What about ECT?”
“All passed in ECT.”
“OK. I will rinse my hair and come out soon.”
“Tshering……” Sonam screeched.
“What?” in an irritated tone I answered.
“We passed without any RA.” She cheered.
“Wait ok. I will kill you.” I meant it when I said.

The fact I passed clean didn’t wash away the tension building inside. I had a task to tell the news of sister’s result.

After rehearsing for several times, I dialed apa’s number and conversed “Apa…how are you? I am fine. Yes, I am staying with friends in Chukha. 6 weeks, I will come home after that. Where are you? What are you doing at school? Today is Sunday. farewell party of a teacher. Ok…result is out and I passed without any RA. Yaya….call me back when you are home. I have something to tell you. Yaya.” I couldn’t tell then as I didn’t want to ruin his mood.

I called ama and told about my results. She asked about sister, after few seconds of silence I told her “Ama…Sonam failed this semester.”
“Is Daza fine? “Was ama’s first question. There was neither scolding nor disappointment in her voice but a concerned about the well being of a sister.

I couldn’t hide from ama that little sister was distracted, worried and scared. Then only, mother figured out why Sonam was avoiding call from her. She asked me to console and tell her not to worry. Mother will be always mother, the well being of the children always come first. I was fool to make ama worry unnecessarily; I could have skipped crying in the office part.

I had to explain the wheel of academic of RUB to her.
“So, Sonam will not go college for next six months. I will talk with Apa. Tell Daza not to worry much and eat well. “ Ama asked.

When I talked with sister yesterday, she was laughing that Apa told her that he failed when he was in class four but also he never gave up. I love the way how Apa wittily conveyed a message to Sonam. Hopefully, Sonam seemed to understand what Apa meant. Apa has always been like that always joking and making us laugh. Ama is bit serious and reserved. We were worried with the false presumptions that they will scold us for failure. They never did, they always support us.

Source: Google Image

Monday, December 22, 2014

Dancing Dust

An accumulated dust in the corner,
Lying idly for god knows how long.
Today, when it’s fate met with a lazy broom
It dances joyously in the air
May be it didn’t enjoy sitting idly
At the corner either.

Thursday, December 11, 2014

New Beginning

It's a new beginning
At a new place with the new people
And with new things to do.
A new beginning to embrace the changes
Without becoming a new person
To accept the new things
Without forgetting an old one.

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

The Bet

 I was absentmindedly copying the highway engineering home assignment to compensate the class I have missed deliberately, no doubt I love missing few occasionally.  Thank god! As irrigation ma’am was yet to come and I had enough time to complete the assigned homework. Next period was highway engineering. We never know the mood swings of the tutor; when we write and complete notes in a clean sheet they never check and if we leave it unattended in a presumption that they never check, they bombard us by checking every notes. It affects our CA and we land up hanging like a Tarzan in end semester exam. I ignored the pain on my forefinger due to pressure it bore for past 45 minutes.

“Girls usually marry first.” I heard Dorji talking behind me. Dorji was a most talkative guy of our class. He always jokes around and smiles a lot. He was a restless who always had time to tease friends with his typical hypocritical talks. Today, his target was Dechen, a complete opposite girl who rarely talks, a tongue-tied who never smiles. Nobody dares to mess with her, she is known for her temperamental. Dorji was digging his own grave. I silently wished him luck. 

“What a cliché.” I was surprised when Dechen replied.  He surely knows how to provoke people.
“Haha…you will marry first and will have bundle of kids by the time I marry.” Dorji teased her.
“Hypocrite, you will be the one who will marry a first girl you encounter right after graduation. Don’t fool around.” Dechen retorted. 

“It doesn’t matter with me. You should marry in your 20s; otherwise you will marry either a widower or divorcee with three kids readymade.” He was irritating not only Dechen but also passive me with his blunt statement. 

“What an attitude! Pig, male chauvinist.” I muttered. 

“Don’t worry about me. I can stand on my own feet. I don’t need a man.” I heard anger in Dechen’d voice.

“Who said you will stand on husband’s feet after marrying? I assure you, you will stand on your feet only. Are you sure you don’t need a man in your life? Planning to be spinster? Hope you are not lesbian, are you?” Dorji winked at her. I expected Dechen to slap him but was surprised when she didn’t. He was irritating guy who sometimes know how to be funny. I silently laughed listening to their conversation while completing the homework.

“Why do you care? I will rather be spinster or lesbian than with kind of a man of your attitude. Sick!” Dechen surely didn’t find it funny. She was overreacting little, I guessed.

“I don’t care at all. I was just saying that girls marry first. And there is no harm in it. Is there? “He continued.

“If girls marry first, whom do they marry with, a pig? You are saying boys marry later. I am sure there should be a boy and a girl to get married.” I liked her sense of humor. 

“Haha….you haven’t understood my point. See, after completing studies or in between, girls are usually the one who marries first compared to boys of same batch. It is a fact.” I didn’t think Dechen didn’t understand his point earlier; she was deliberately twisting the points.

“You want to bet?” Dechen challenged. I completed copying notes and faced them to listen along with the couple of friends who were already engrossed with an entertainment they provided. 

“Who, with you? I don’t want to. I will win without any doubt. ” Dorji lazily declared.

“Are you afraid or you are already having a wife and kids at home?” Dechen wasn’t a person we thought, not at least tongue-tied though temperamental part was partly true.

“Ok. The one who marry first will have to pay a lakh to other.” Dorji laughingly said.
“Ok, keep your words.” Dechen said fumingly. 

“Yes, your highness.” He mocked a respect and bowed to her triggering laughter from us.

“Yes, class. Any special discussion you wish to share with me?” Irrigation Ma’am arrived wearing a lovely dress glowing with a beautiful smile. Chair dragged, table moved and students positioned to get ready for the class.

After completing three years of services in DOR in Phuntsholing and two years of M.E. in Transportation Engineering from Thailand, I was placed at head office at Thimphu. I was busy shopping around when I accidentally bumped with a person.

“Sorry…sorry” we offered our apologies. “Tshering?” “Dorji?” we spoke together.

“Hi, when did you come back? I heard you went abroad.” Dorji said.

“I came few weeks before. You are at PHPA-II right? “It was a question which felt like a statement.

“Yeah, we came here for a family shopping.” He said with a smile.

“Wait, what ‘we’ and ‘family’? You lost a bet?” I laughed at him remembering an infamous bet of college days.

“No, I didn’t lose.” He sheepishly grinned.

“So, Dechen lost? Did she pay you a lakh?” I asked curiously.

“I guess, neither of us won or lost the bet.” He said. I quizzically looked at him and then 
followed his eyes to the direction where a woman was coming with an infant in her arms.

“Dechen!” I gasped looking at an unexpected family of the century.

Corrupted Soul

She had a transparent yet a corrupted soul,
Unconditionally loving the loved one
Feeling way less for a walking stranger.
Biased was her soul
Bestowing too much care to the people
That meant world for her
Ignorant were those with her feelings
Or her unwavering affection for them.
Her wasn’t a saint soul
For it expected not whole but a little
Till it withers with every disappointment at last.

Women in 20s