Monday, May 19, 2014

That's Him

“Sonam! Sonam! That’s him.” A girl in a light pink dress said.
“Who, who?” Sonam, probably her friend asked.

“That guy in white coat wearing a red checked shirt from inside. See he is going upstairs now.” She assisted her friend in identifying.

I checked the mail on the phone while waiting.

“He is cute and handsome.” Sonam dreamily said.

I am not much of eavesdropper, but I couldn’t help as I was sitting in the same bench with them in the hospital, waiting.

“Looks can be deceiving dear. He is a total player.” A girl replied.

“Hmm…looks like a cute doctor broke somebody’s heart. Is it your heart he played with, Kezang?” Sonam teased.

“No.” Kezang replied a bit harshly.

It seems a sensitive subject for Kezang. May be her friend Sonam sensed that too as she dropped the subject.
I searched earphones in handbag to listen some music. Looks like I had to wait some more and I have no interest to listen gossips.

“Look that player is coming again.” Kezang blurted rather angrily.
I couldn’t help but look at the guy they were referring.
“Him?” I raised my brows in confusion. Surely, it evokes my curiosity and intended to listen full story. 

“What happened, Kezang? You surely know him well.” Sonam was not ready to leave the matter easily.
“I didn’t meet him personally, but I know him.” Kezang replied.
“You are not really making sense.” Sonam said, little frustrated.
“He is my cousin sister’s ex now. A few months back, she narrated that they were in love each other and he is good…blah…blah…blah. “Kezang stopped.

“So what happened?” Sonam asked my question.
“We went shopping and my cousin was ghost stricken when she saw him. Yeah, I didn’t know the guy who was going ahead of us were him, shamelessly holding another girl’s hand and acting like a Romeo.”

“Can you believe him? He wooed my cousin until she said yes and it wasn’t even a month, he got fed up and started going with others.” Kazang said with a pinch of hatred.
“So?” Sonam asked, getting intrigued by the story.
“I saw cousin crying over the betrayal. He called many times over, but she simply broke up with him. He didn’t ask the reason behind, maybe he knew it.” She narrated.

I scanned the corridor and saw him coming.
“Look, he is making way to us, masking an innocent smile and preying girls. He is a total womanizer.” There was so much hatred in Kezang.

He stopped before us.
“Tshering, let’s go now.” He said.I collected papers and shouldered the bag.
“Brother, you go first. I have an urgent call to make. I will catch you shortly.” I said.
“Ok. Don’t be late.” He walked away.

I looked at the girls who were ghost stricken now. Sonam was unconsciously pinching Kezang.
“Are you sure it’s him?” I asked Kezang.
Both the girls fidgeted. I walked smiling.

In the car, “Brother, you really are popular.”
“Am I?” he smiled rather proudly.
“Yes, you are but as a villain.” I laughed at him.
While he drove home, I laughed at him over and over. 

Friday, May 2, 2014

We Chose to Tell You

“O poor, unthinking human heart! The error will not go away; logic and reason are slow to penetrate. We cling with both arms to false hope, refusing to believe the weightiest proofs against it, embracing it with all our strength. In the end it escapes, ripping our veins and draining our heart’s blood; until, regaining consciousness, we rush to fall into snares of delusion all over again.” Rabindranth Tagore (from ‘The Postmaster’).

‘Should we tell her or not?’ the violent battle in our mind robs the every piece of peace we had. She will be hurt beyond words if we do, but at least she will know the truth. Initial hurt will eventually subsidize with the time, but fearing the hurt she has to endure with shattering truth, we chose to keep the cat safely in the bag. But masking the truth will also hurt her ultimately when she finds out, she had enough betrayal from the loved one and we can’t let her believe the world isn’t worth trusting. Somewhere down the line there is always somebody who cares about someone. She is not a subject of deception and betrayal. There is a fire on both sides; one end with the devastating truth and beautiful nonexistent fairy castle she built at the other end.

Last time we made a mistake of hiding truth from her, she was more hurt not with the truth, but the fact that we choose to hide from her. If last one was gunfire this time is an atom bomb that will blow her faith completely. She was wounded and sank into a different world of isolation earlier. We had to tell her this time and we promised to stand by her side.

After spilling every truth with the little courage we had, she scanned our faces and smiled weakly. She said it makes sense as there was a connection between what she knew and what we told. She asked when we knew about the truth. Honestly, we said "recently". I said that good things come to an end so better things can take place.

After soaking into a momentary silence, she asked “Does anyone have a very sad movie? I want to watch tonight.” breaking a silence with laughter.
We joined her and were glad that she took it positively like always. She is our rare and brave girl. You have a way to go dear and I know you will be reading it, so want to let you know that we love you beyond words. I could tell you in person, but you know how bad I am with the words, I will freakishly lend up blurting nonsense and stupid.


I wonder, did we do the right thing by telling you? We did what we thought was best for you, but guilt plays a prominent role when you transits into a world of silence.